Showing posts with label all about me. Show all posts
Showing posts with label all about me. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Coming Home




When I carried my duffel bag up to
My old room,
leather backpack slung over my right shoulder
Macbook in hand,
I found a small disposable camera
Just sitting there,
In a pile of old magazines.
I picked it up, full roll of film.
Without thinking, I snapped my first picture.
My pillows, with their old-lady print
That didn't match my quilt,
The one my grandmother made,
equally dowdy,
but less colorful.
I turned.
The next photo was the miniature Tibetan Prayer Flags
hung across my windows in lieu of curtains.
They came free in the mail one day
And no one can see my room anyhow.
Next, my dresser, covered in debris.
Old, cheap, childish imitations of make-up,
Costume jewelry,
Acne medication,
My softball mitt,
A porcelain doll.
Click.
My mirror, full-length,
Propped against the wall.
Turn.
Old concert tickets,
Autographs from bands
I no longer listen to.
My door, with its faux-vintage travel stickers.
My bathroom mirror,
Open and Closed.
The inside of my closet.
My cowboy boots.
My duffel, with it's old-lady print.
That does not match my pillows
Or my quilt.
Sitting on the foot of my bed,
Waiting to be unopened, unpacked.
I leave it for the morning
And use up the rest of the film.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Rant

Misogyny is a funny thing, when you think about it.
I mean, it's not funny in a Ha Ha sort of way, of course.
It's just...
How many guys see one of their female friends
(See! They aren't misogynists! They have women who are Just Friends!)
Angry and crying and instinctively think
"That Time Of The Month."
How many guys always want to drive because deep down
Deep deep deep deep down
They honestly assume, without cause
That they are better drivers than their woman passengers.
How many guys associate 'feminist'
With hairy-legged angry lesbian with blue hair and an eyebrow piercing?
How many guys assume they need to help
With everything
And I do mean everything
Because it's 'chivalrous.'
Clearly, nothing gets those panties dropping
Like calling a chick incompetent.
If a guy doesn't say 'twat'
But assumes without question every girl wants to have a happily-ever-after marriage
He's still an asshole.
Maybe a bigger one.
Cause 'cunt' 'bitch' 'twat' 'ho'
They're just words.
And words have no real power
Said the writer.
But ideas.
Ideas are where the poison hides.
Latent, shadowed thoughts,
Assumed superiority
These are the men who really make
A feminist's skin crawl.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I was going to let out some angst... but...



No one likes to read about people feeling sorry for themselves. Proven fact. Whiny little girls, as a rule, should not be given access to their own websites because they will inevitably wind up annoying the hell out of everyone around them.

So, bearing this in mind, here is a top-of-my-head list of all the things that make me awesome:

-I rock the hell out of this bright, rich turquoise color that happens to be my favorite shade on the planet

-I have, on occasion, been known to pull some pretty fantastic writing out of nowhere just before a paper's due

-I love the people that matter in my life so deeply it baffles me, and it takes a whole hell of a lot to change that

-My hair is bouncy, my eyelashes are a mile long, and I have a more than adequate bod despite a love of carbs and an aversion to any exercise that requires real sweating

-I can identify anyone from Greco-Roman mythology by name alone

-There are people who love me as much as I love them... even if they are far away

-I have a steady hand and sharp sight on the shooting range

-My cooking kicks ass

-I can connect with almost any dog I encounter

-I know my hockey

-I dominate at any game an old fart from Michigan can play: euchre, shuffleboard, cribbage

-I can organize herds of drunk college students without getting called "mom"

-I'm equally adept at flirting and being one of the guys

So... I really have no reason to be upset right now. Cause I'm a pretty sweet person.

Hey, if you wanted to read someone's humble thoughts on themselves, go read a blog called "milkmaid complex" or something.


Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Wishful Thinking (a letter to myself, 6 months ago)



Every girl thinks she can be the one to "fix him."

You can't.

No, seriously. Stop trying right now. This will only end one way: with you curled up in the corner of your room, listening to Charlotte Sometimes and wondering why it didn't work.

You wanna know why it didn't work? Cause you have no magical power over men. This isn't Gilmore Girls, there's no reason whatsoever you should be able to make him a better person. He doesn't want to be a better person. He really, really likes who he is now.

Think about it. If this guy had any desire to change, doncha think he would've self-motivated by now? What makes you think you're so special you can put the desire for change in his head?

You are such a narcissist.

Now, what do you say we go find ourselves a new project? Like knitting. If you find a flaw in that scarf, just unravel it and start over.

I promise it will be a lot less frustrating than this.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Testing... testing...



Oh look. It's another college kid with a blog.

But seriously folks, don't all rush over at once.

For the most part, this is going to be a collection of my creative writings and whatnot, with a little dash of me. Cause who wouldn't want to hear from the dazzling creature that is Abby every once in a while?

I wanted to just get right to posting, but it felt a little wrong to just dive right into my world, after all, just what sort of girl do you think I am? You'd better at least be buying me dinner first. Or maybe just coffee if you're cute. Or maybe a nice "Hey" if you happen to be Ryan Reynolds. Just sayin.

Anyway, don't expect constant posts, and I will do my very best not to bore you. Comments are love, they feed my fragile little ego. Even if it's to tell me that I suck, cause all writers like to point and laugh at their critics.

A bit about me, just so we have some sort of understanding to base this relationship off of:
  • I'm a first-year student at Kalamazoo College
  • My first celebrity crush was Hal Jordan
  • I'm a SCUBA diver (scuba...scuba...scuba...)
  • I have an unhealthy obsession with neon post-its and click-top sharpies
  • I keep a tumbler full of dumdum pops on my desk for when I have to think
  • I have an all-too-real fear of zombies
  • My eleventh-grade economics teacher Mr. Smith bares a freakish resemblance to Mr. Scheuster of Glee. Needless to say, I was in love with him
And that's... really all I have to say for now. Hope to see you around.